Monday, December 13, 2010

Inspired by "It Won't Be Long" and a Dream

"It Won't Be Long" by The Beatles. Paul McCartney was the musical guest on SNL the other day, so of course they used him as much as possible in the sketches. I quite enjoyed that episode.

A dream I just had which included an old friend in California, probably not who the reader would automatically think of first, so be careful with your assumptions.

Anyways everyone is leaving and it is starting to get real that this semester is over, and I was thinking about it and I really don't have all that much to go home to. I was considering trying to organize some sort of Danish Party when I get home, but honestly who would I invite? I haven't seen my friends from school in a really long time and they all go far away from Sonoma over summer anyways. My best friend will be in Australia for a bit, then trying to get over her own re-entry culture shock. One of my really good friends has mysteriously stopped talking to me altogether and shows no interest in rebuilding our friendship, at least while I am abroad. My other friend at home spends that majority of her time with her boyfriend and will probably have some sort of prestigious internship. Senior year of high school I cut ties with all of my friends at my high school because I assumed that high school friends do not matter after college, and boy was I wrong. I do not know if it is our world's new fascination with community college, but I feel like in the social world I see around me high school friends are the most important that you have. This seems to be an even bigger deal when you think that most Danish people are in the same social groups they have been in since preschool.

I just reread that post, and it sounds completely ridiculous, but I am not going to delete it. The problem isn't that the people in my life at home are inadequate, it is that I have so much history at home and I let that drama get in the way. The life I left will be completely different from the life I am going home to. Two of my histories most important characters are gone from my present, but being home will most likely introduce them in new roles, which will be difficult for me to accept. I like to have close and sincere relationships, but I can be a lot to handle sometimes. If you think trying to keep up with my blog is exhausting, you could probably not even imagine the emotional rollercoaster and slight burden I can be. I have made some really good friends here, and most of them are leaving in less than a week. Every relationship I have here is healthy and wonderful and amazing and it seems to showcase in my mind how messed up my recent social life has been.

This post started out in my mind as "I want a boyfriend, possibly a young Paul McCartney, to miss me and count the days until I get home and we can be together." Buuuuuut, I don't have that. It is also hard to be abroad because I think I am in a place in my life where I could really use a boyfriend, and that isn't going to happen here because we would have to say goodbye and I hate goodbyes. I will definitely be rocking the single girl lifestyle until at least next fall, and I am okay with that, I just wish I had someone to go home to.

On a completely unrelated note, well actually very related, I miss my family. I only know one other girl who is here for a year who is not seeing her family for Christmas. I am not ready to go back at all, but if my family could just move here that would be great. This is probably twice as long as I have ever been away from home before, one of the perks of living only 2 hours away when I am at Sonoma. I am going to throw the most epic Danish themed sister night. We will just pretend that she is not blood-obligated to spend time with me.

NOW SOMETHING INTERESTING:
Today is Santa Lucia Day. She is a saint, and there is all this religious business attached with her in Sweden, but this is not Sweden, this is Denmark. In Denmark they started really celebrating Santa Lucia day to "bring light into the darkness" during WWII as a passive protest to German occupation. I am going to go down to the procession at Nyhavn and see her. I think she may come on a boat? I am not sure. I know that somehow the København Kayak Club is somehow involved. Someone also told me that sometimes the night before Santa Lucia you turn out the electric lights and light only candles (which isn't very different from the rest of my Danish candle-lit nights) but it greatly amused me because yesterday my building had the sketchiest power outage ever. We thought it was haunted, but I guess it was really Santa Lucia helping us find some light in the darkness.

Still loving life, still smiling big. We will see how my emotional state changes throughout the week with my final, project, and all my friends leaving to go home.

3 comments:

  1. Honestly, I wish I had been single when I studied abroad. It was really hard to not be able to talk to or be with Steven, and I spent so much time missing him that I didn't really do anything else. I also wished I hadn't come home for Christmas, because I think if I had stayed in Ireland, or traveled, or something, I would have done better second semester. I had finally just gotten into the swing of things and met some friends in Dublin, and when I came back to CA, I lost it all and was completely miserable all second semester because I had to get used to Ireland all over again.

    I know its really hard right now, but its only one Christmas away from home, and you're having too many cool experiences. Nothing has changed at home really, except the tree fell over and they screwed up our chicken platter for the party. There are a few cool packages on their way to you, but you probably won't get your Christmas presents until New Years, sadly.

    So just remember to have an epic non American holiday, so when you come back it'll be even better. I am having trouble finding the Christmas spirit with only me doing the advent calendar and eating mint m&ms and listening to Elvis, but you are also missing a lot of stupid pouring rain and people being sick anyway. Please if you go to England or Ireland, send me home a pudding and some Christmas crackers, I miss Irish Christmas. Miss you! <3

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  2. Also, please be impressed that I wrote all that from my phone.

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  3. Obviously I am a little late in responding to this as I am using vacation as "catch up on Julia's blog" time, but if you had an epic Danish party when you return home I would totally come if you deemed me cool enough to be invited. Also, I TOTALLY get your part about wanting the boyfriend at home to be waiting for you. I felt the same way, but in the end it was better I didn't have it. Less distraction and a lot cheaper! I guess now you young people have skype which is free but my American friend spend thousands of dollars calling her bf twice a day the entire time we were there.

    Sending you hugs!!

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